Sunday, March 16, 2008

Friends always show their love

Since I involved serving and committing for child needy, I got a new friend who has made my life more colorful. We always share and support each other. She is a lovely girl; always stand beside me whenever I need her. She is the first person that I really want to share when my feeling rush. I know she love me as her sister and she is special in my life too.

Several past days, I learned how to be a true friend for some one, giving unconditional love. In the morning, I went to my office with happiness, checked my email and I saw a new email from my beloved friend. I thought she want to share about the kids lives. I was exciting to open it and I was upset after I read her email. She told me about her stuck feeling working within the kids and that environment. She told me that she is seeking what she really needs for her future now.

Usually we go together to some place every Saturday for church service. I found that community because she brought me. She asked me to assist her for kid Sunday school. I like teaching and kids so I was exciting when she invite me. All people in that community also know that I met her because of the needy kids. I’m happy playing with these kids. I always wait for Saturday and Sunday because I can off from my work and do for something different. My friend’s email also told me that right now for every Saturday and Sunday, she really needs a place where she totally meets different people and totally far away from the needy kids story. She was asking me not to go with her because if I still around her, she can’t totally get free life from the kids. She needs socialization in the different community. I understand her. 5 years working and stay within the kids every day. She is young girl and like other girls, she also need different environment. I want she is always happy and get all her dreams. I love her and that is a reason I replied her email that I will not go with her.

Honesty when I wrote it, my heart broken and I cried. I did not hate her or think bad thing about her. I also really want to help her to get happiness because she is special for me but on the other hand, I felt so sad because I can’t meet my Sunday kids anymore. I even did not say anything before I leave them. I promise that I will buy a DVD about God’s story and watching together some day. I have prepared drawing for them to coloring it for homework. All these things move me. I love all the naughty of these kids and I’m losing it now. I even can’t say anything when my Pastor asks me why I did not come.
I was asking my self why I can’t stop crying out if I really love her as my friend. It was show that my love is not pure for her. I only think my self. If I love her and her happiness is important for my life, I should happy if I can sacrifice some thing for her. God trade His life for all my sins without consideration because God has unconditional love for me. He never care how heavy that cross to cost my sins and my salvation. God was happy when HE did it. I learned how to give unconditional love now. Friends always show their love. What are sisters / brother for if not to share trouble?
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